This post features a new player’s journal! The PC is Guy (pronounced “Gi” (hard g)), played by “JoCool”. Guy is a cleric of La Matrone, who apparently takes on different aspects depending on whom views her and her holy symbols.

We’re not sure what she really looks like, but different PCs have seen her as…

So, without further comment (or strange avatars!), here’s Guy:

Entry 1: [7/11/23]

Merci, ma Chere. Thank you in advance for listening to my ramblings through this mess. I’m writing all this down in the hopes I will be the one to read it to you back home when this is over. I stepped in it big time, for sure. I do try my best to stay on the right side of the law, but you know, c’est ce que c’est.

I don’t remember much of the ride here. Probably for the best. Looks like a place that I’m going to be doing a lot of wishing for home and a good hot meal and glass of wine with you.

It is a pretty nasty place. Even the name, “Oily Messy”. I wasn’t here 5 minutes before someone pointed me to the closest hole in the ground called the Black Maw and told me, “Go get rich or die trying.” I had no idea what I was in for. Crazy winding tunnels and rooms full of wind and webs and monsters. Danger everywhere, and you know I’m not the best with that sort of thing.

I did meet some pretty stand-up guys, though. I think you’ll like them. Not sure they’re up for a real introduction yet, but I’m sure you’ll let me know. There’s two elves. Never seen any before, and two of them – right here as big as life. They’re just as scrappy and tough as the rest. No wimpy little fey creatures in this bunch. There’s Elmond: He’ll slice anything in his way no matter how disgusting. There’s Scale: He’s a mystery. Pretty sure I caught him looking at you when he didn’t think I was watching. At least he’s got good taste, no? Then, there’s humans as well. Fenrick: He’s a priest of some unknown fella. He seems a little less than charitable but decent enough. There’s a witch-doctor named Unnakhon. He looks like he has a good idea what’s going on. Always knows which way we’re going while I’m getting dizzy down here. There’s J: He reminds me of Grandpere with that wisdom, gravelly voice, and cough. Hope that’s not a symptom of these tunnels. There’s even 2 guys that seem to just be hanging around and cussin’ or agreeing at everything the others say. They’re Darwin and Ned. Not so sure about them.

We may have finally found some gold, but these massive metal men are keeping us from getting it.

This place is confusing, and I’m relying on the these guys to see me through for now. Hopefully, I’ll be able to return the favor soon. I know you’ll be with me to help when it counts.

Entry 2: [7/25/23]

Still in the dark, looking for that golden ticket out of here. Another fella steps up I didn’t see before: Erwin. Seems like another decent one to stand behind when some monster comes calling. Seems to fidget with his pants a lot, though.

We give up on the gold guarded by metal men and move on, only to stumble on some terrible bugs. Elmon takes a nasty bite from something that I’m sure would have done me in. He shrugs off that nasty bite, and off we go. We find our way into a gambling den. Fenrick can’t help himself and jumps into the game. Everything seems ok until Scale loses his mind on one of the little gamblers. They send their fighting rat’s on us like Grandpere sends his dogs on hogs in the garden. I give em a bit of what he showed me on dealing with hogs and put ’em down with my club. Meanwhile, Scale murders a little drunk guy so the other will talk. I know you hear that prayer when it happens. I guess that fellow hasn’t seen you yet. He passes right on and never looks back. We now have a door and a way to go for possibly more gold. Is that good?

Entry 3: [8/22/23]

A hostage situation. Grandpere would be ashamed, and I’m sure you will be too. That little fella that was left is forced to tell us where we could go to get more gold. It’s hard to judge what’s best at this point. Your light is so far away, and I do want to make my way back.

I pull this old chisel off a shelf. I wonder if I’m any good with it. I guess I’ll show you later whether I can make anything or not.

On a bright note, Scale, the murderer puts the monsters we found with treasure to peaceful sleep. On a less bright note, they are then murdered in their sleep. Also, the little fella that led us here dies when he tries to run away and alert those monsters.

On another bright note, we do get some treasure to carry out. Some little crazy guys threaten us on the way out, though. Scale catches one in a net, and I want to make sure he doesn’t get away. My hands are full with a big box of coins. I either make a bad call or a worse call. I drop it right on the li’l guy. His head busts. The box busts. J gives the most sage advice I have heard so far. RUN. I run… Pretty sure that smashed li’l guy’s brother said he will murder me. I’m sure it will be fine, though. All’s well that ends well. We have some treasure and exit alive. Apparently, that is a bigger accomplishment than most can hope for.

Entry 4: [9/5/23]

That solid rock Elmon needs our help. We have to get the hair of the dog that bit him – in this case, the body of the bug, so a potion can be made to cure the sickness spreading from the bite. We find the body. It’s a little… chewed up, which is disturbing. What eats on nasty bugs down here? We should have what we need, but no one wants to waste the trip down that might give us some more to add to our golden tickets.

After a little further exploration we find some very dead little fellas. (You know this part, because you came when I called.) You show your light and they run! More of those nasty bugs run away and into the walls, but the little fellas can’t find a hole. We help them with their condition. No one needs to be undead, and they have a few things of value for us to take. Scale is declared the “Kobold King” here, and now I know what the little fellas are. I think the tiny “throne” is cute, and you’d like to see it so I pick it up. I am dubbed “The Throne Bearer” for Scale by Unnakhon. I shrug and go along. If he has a place to sit, maybe he will have a little more peace. We could all use that, even if it is in a tiny chair.

Entry 5: [9/19/23]

We hang around Oily Messy far longer than I would like, but at least nothing is trying to kill us silently in the dark for now. We recruit a sketchy “Doc Happyday” to make a potion to cure Elmon using the bug that bit him.

A very disturbing character identifies the arrows we found as magical. I’m not all that interested, and I know you’re not in weapons of true war either.

I was pleasantly surprised to find a temple in this little mess of a town. There I meet Leela of the Islands. She sees one of your true faces, and I rejoice! She’s dedicated to some ocean god and sees it as a passing fancy, but I’m sure she’s secretly looking for you. Everybody is… While the others that have been injured heal their wounds, I spend some time helping her out in the little temple and leaving little hints here and there for her and anyone else of where to look for you.

The potion for Elmon actually works, and I know you have a hand in it. The others won’t believe, so I let Doc Happyday have his moment in the light. We all need one.

I catch Fenric taking a good, hard look at you. I’m pretty sure of what he sees. All the good things you can bring that he wants. I can’t fault him. Those are all good things…

Everyone seems to be ready to go back into the Black Maw. I thought myself ready as well, but I think, maybe, I should stick around the temple and help out Leela for a bit. This place really is a mess. I’m sure you’ll help me find the right place to be when I’m needed most.

(Image of Guy and of “Fenric’s version of La Matrone” are copyright JoCool 2023, all rights reserved).

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